Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Arrested: Beautifully Engaged

Hey Folks! I am recently back from missionary training in Colorado…talk about 5 Weeks of “wow!” Surprisingly, this training focused in on the heart of the participant (Missionaries heading to all corners of the globe).
Topics of discussion and study ranged from conflict styles, spiritual growth, emotional wellbeing, grief, etc. The training was filled to the brim with topics designed to make us Western missionaries think in a different way.

What changed my life:

1) Conflict: I know I am a consummate avoider of conflict. Yet, like most of us, I have never been challenged with the damage my confrontation style generates. I have new tools now. This is Good.


2) Grieving: For some reason, while I emote in a blog, I am forever hiding any demonstrative grief about leaving my family, friends, home, and country for strangers and Fiji. While in training I, along with my comrades, had an opportunity to explore the grief, fear, expectations, and tears that sit in our gut. Now, ask me how I feel about leaving. I will tell you I am excited…but never have I been more uncomfortable in my life. I am filled with anxiety that I keep handing to God because I am tired of it; this anxious feeling is heavy. Good thing my Papa-God’s shoulders are wide. This is Very Good.


3) Community: Few will receive the privilege God has granted me. For 5 weeks I lived with, cried with, laughed, became upset with, and spent veritably every blithering waking moment with 40 individuals who come from all walks of life. Enter men and women, young and old, single and married who have vastly different styles of worship and theological preferences; whom all love Jesus with desperation. Oh, the wisdom! Oh the stories of experience and heartbreak and change.

Oh, my Jesus, the beauty of dirty prisoners robed in Your righteousness. And they go all over with a message: Jesus saves. They will feed, bring water, create business, raise children, run camps, teach, rescue the molested. Live and live and live. What stunning Good. So Good.

And so I am home. For Now.

What now? I get to wait. Wait. Wait. Wait. Good to know that God is good to those who wait on Him, whom seek Him .Lamentations 3:25

Okay, waxing poetic is complete :-) I am waiting on a call from my sending agency that says I am 100% funded for the funds I need to live. I am about $200 shy of what I need. Once I have this last $200 a month coming in I can buy my plane ticket and leave.